ISO FeedbackPosted: September 4, 2018
Most people say they want feedback, but also tend to react badly when negative or even constructive feedback is given. What most people really want is affirmation that they are doing a good job. They want the participation trophy that really doesn’t tell them anything about how they did or what they can do to better themselves. As a result, when people ask for feedback, most respondents either avoid answering or try to get away with giving some platitude like “you are doing fine” or “I wouldn’t change a thing.” The problem is such feedback does nothing to help you improve.
If you really want to improve, you need to ask for feedback in a way that lets other people know you mean it and that they won’t be open for attack the minute they open their mouth. The best way to do that is to limit the request and be specific about the topic. The limit is satisfied by saying “tell me one thing…” The specificity is then up to the requester. Some examples:
- Tell me one thing that would improve our weekly staff meeting.
- Tell me one thing that would make my emails better.
- Tell me one thing that would help you get more out of your periodic evaluation.
Just as too much choice leads to indecision, too much leeway in asking for feedback has your evaluator running a myriad of possibilities through their mind. By limiting the scope and topic, you help the person being asked to give feedback to focus and prioritize. An added benefit of asking for such focused feedback is that it usually ends up being something concrete that can actually be changed.
So are you ready for some feedback that will help you change? If so, ask me one thing….